So in case you didn't know, school lets out today!! Honestly, I might be more excited than the kids. Summertime for us means me not working, afternoons at the pool, sleepovers with friends, picnics at the park, weekly bike-rides to the library, etcetera. I've got to admit, the kids and I have it pretty good. I often get that slight pang of guilt when I hand Jarred his kiss and coffee-to-go in the mornings and wish him a great day at work, and he wishes us a great day... at the pool.
Fun, however, is not the only item on our summer agenda. Well, maybe for the kids. But not for me! Summer is also my season to "home-school." Now, before you get any grand notions in your head about me dutifully displaying mathematical flash cards as my children sharpen their math skills or conducting scientific experiments on our kitchen counter while my children watch in awe behind protective, plastic glasses, let me be clear. I am quite comfortable, at this point, leaving my children's basic academic lessons in the hands of their wonderfully talented teachers. The "home-schooling" I am referring to is of another dimension.
See, I think up until recent generations, home-schooling was a common phenomenon. I would even go as far as to say that many cultures still practice home-schooling around the world. At risk of sounding like a "fuddy-duddy" (what is that anyway?), the home-schooling I wish to resurrect is the training of my children's moral character and skills for adulthood. There. I said it. This, I fear, is a lost art in many homes today, probably due in part to the fact that families are pulled in dozens of directions. But I also think this has a lot to do with what we (including myself) believe about children and what we value about life.
It seems to me that our culture (at least the suburban culture I am a part of) believes that: Number one, the chief end of childhood is to "have fun!" And number two, children can only be expected to participate in an activity if it is entertaining or ends with some sort of pleasure reward (i.e. candy). It's my opinion that these two beliefs are producing individuals who expect to be constantly entertained, who are missing the experience of intrinsic rewards (i.e. I feel proud that I was competent enough to complete that task or contribute to the family. Or... Watching the flowers pop up is so fascinating; maybe next year I'll talk to Mom about planting a garden.), and who are in many ways immature.
So here are some of my goals for home-schooling my children over the summer. (I hope it is understood that I don't look at summer as the only time to train my children. It is, however, when we have the most concentrated time to optimize on life lessons.)
1. Stop labeling every activity as "fun." I can't tell you how often I find myself saying to my children, "This will be fun!" Or... "Wasn't that fun?!" I am indirectly telling my children that something is only worth doing if it is fun. Well, feeding my family is not always fun, but I do it because it's important. Studying for tests was a complete headache, but it was necessary to succeed in school. Visiting residents at the nursing home was a little smelly and uncomfortable, but the kids brought smiles to some very lonely, forgotten people and felt the joy of doing so.
2. Implement a daily morning routine with responsibilities. So before we run off to the pool or invite friends over to play in the afternoon, I want my children to learn that work comes before play (and play is more enjoyable when in that order). I am going to use this summer as a time to further train the kids on some basic household duties, like how to run the washer and dryer and how to scrub the toilets. As they are able to help out with more of the everyday chores, I will hopefully be more free to tackle the neglected ones (i.e. cleaning windows!!) Personally, I think, if trained properly, children are quite capable of much more than we think. (I think of my parents' Amish neighbors whose children help in the garden, collect eggs, and drive horses in the fields at probably the ages of my own children.)
3. Encourage 45 minutes of daily reading. Our local library offers a summer reading program where the children keep track of how many books they read and can "cash in" tickets for prizes. I suppose the kids are reading mostly for the prizes, but I hope that as they read more, they will become better readers, seek out better books, and better develop their knowledge and creativity.
4. Restrict screen time to 2 hours a day. This restriction is mostly for our son who loves any kind of gadget with a screen, but who can actually entertain himself quite well once he realizes no person or gadget is around to do it for him. I am very excited to report that my children have finally begun watching reruns of Little House on the Prairie, the TV series my friends and I grew up watching and learning from (talk about a huge difference in value compared to SpongeBob!) Screen time does not merely need to be restricted; we parents can influence the quality of what our children are watching, too.
5. Teach money values. In an excessively, abundant culture such as ours, I find this very tricky. I want Dylan and Jaida to learn the value of waiting for something they want (versus instant gratification) and working and saving for that purchase. The children already know that gifts are for birthdays and Christmas, so if they really want something between thoses times, it must come from their own wallets. Already we have watched them make connections over the value of a dollar, save their coins for something more valuable than candy, and take pride in handing their own money to the cashier at Target. I've put together a list of tasks (above the weekly chores) that they may earn an extra dollar or two by completing--everything from washing out the garbage cans to wiping down the baseboards to organizing their dressers.
I may not need to teach my children skills for survival or pass along a trade such as some children may be learning in other cultures, but I still feel a great responsibility to prepare my children for responsible, mature adulthood. Will you join me in this endeavor of "home-schooling" this summer? What will your goals be?
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